Warriors from a Forgotten War--Korea and Dad

The Wisconsin Korean War Memorial was dedicated in 1997 in Plover. Chet Skippy, a realty developer and Korean War veteran worked hard to make it happen. On that summer day my brother, mom and dad came up for the dedication.

Dad stood apart from us, apart from everyone... on the sandy shore of the island memorial looking towards the Statues yet beyond them. He looked so vulnerable, so alone even though we all tried to reach him but none of us could.

After the ceremony with state dignitaries including David Obey who talked about the forgotten war (it wasn't even called a war until recently, but rather the Korean Conflict) we wandered in a discount tool vendor's tent on the grounds. Dad bought me a set of little clamps to use when I went to dog shows, then we went to a nearby restaurant for lunch.

I'm the toughest sonofabitch
this side of the Rio Grande.
If you think you can take me, come on, let's go.
Think you have it in you?
Think its going to be easy? ...you've another guess comin'
'cause I'll fight til I die and I'll not die easy.
I'm the toughest sonofabitch
this side of the Rio Grande.
--excerpt from "My Dad" by Bobbie Lee S. Kolehouse

Dad was tough. He had grit and stamina, but he wasn't a street brawler. He admired street brawlers. What he seemed to search for was confidence and he mistook reactionary possessiveness for it. He tried to tap it through other people. He depended on them to "have what it takes" in case he didn't. He wasn't possessive, he was introverted and spent much of his life in his head, then fogged it up with alcohol trying to escape. Thoughts made uglier from what he'd lived in Korea.

Now my dad was a farm boy and knew better than many about life and death and survival, but he didn't know about war except for the romanticized stories. His father and mother were farmers, not warriors. Quiet, stable, dependable people. He was ambitious and a bit willful. He always considered himself a bit of a rebel--but he wasn't one by nature.

He tried to enlist and was rejected because of a heart murmur, but he cleared the second time and landed in the Army. He was close to his brother Lee who was in the Merchant Marine. Lee was scrappy, and bold--different from my dad and most of his family. Dad was the youngest of eight. At home with his family he was always Bobby.

Throughout his life he grappled with and clung to his military experience. His closest friends were veterans, some highly decorated for valor and courage--all alcoholics. It was a nightmare they all shared and gloried in and fell victim to in the end. Throughout his life he'd quip, usually in an alcohol stupor, "Think you got what it takes?" He never got home again and we all miss him yet.

With planning this time we can provide resources to assure good transition programs are in place for our current military veterans returning from war. Their service doesn't have to cost them their lives, and the lives of those who love them, even if make it back safely.

All military veterans, thank you and your families for your service.

**Wallet pictured was a gift from my father to my mother's sister, Gloriann Meyn, brought back from Korea. My aunt gave it to me as a keepsake of my father.**

From the WKWM website, http://www.koreanmemorial.org/index.html

The Korean War - June 25, 1950 thru July 27, 1953

Forgotten by all but those that served.

War is truly hell and those who fought would never glorify it. Those Wisconsinites helped save a nation and then returned home, without honor or fanfare.

Wisconsin has long forgotten the 132,000 of her sons and daughters who served in the cause of freedom in the Korean War

	801 were killed in action
	4,286 were wounded
	111 were prisoners of war (54 of these died in POW camps)
	84 are still officially listed as missing in action